26. independent friends

Just like I need silence to write, I need my independence to live- well, to live a life I am entirely happy with anyway. Some people get it, some people don’t and a lot learn about it along the way. But I mean it when I say if you take away my independence your not left with something pretty, your left with a very ugly version of myself.

Independence means you get to make your own choices and think for yourself ....sounds simple right?? But what happens if your independence is suddenly taken away?

When I think independence, I think: car, money, house, phone, social life. . .

Imagine if you lost your car, found yourself with little money, you had no room to call your own, your phone broke and you started to notice your social life was um less than social. It can happen-and when it does you need hold on to that independence as tightly as you can- even if that means catching a bus, using a pay phone, sleeping on your parents couch and buying el cheapo wine.

Its ok to let others do things for you occasionally, but if you  depend on it you will probably never truly have a sense of self worth.

If you are on the journey to become a more independent or less dependent wo/man don’t forget there are people in your life that can support you without compromising that journey.

If you feel like you are starting to become a bit dependent, start doing a few things for yourself because Its true what they say (as corny as it sounds): no one can ever really love you, until you love yourself.

25. faking it until making it

It was suggested by a few different people that I write about three different topics today; psychics, greed and a new adventure I could be embarking on. But after much thought I have decided to write about determination, which pretty much relates to all three.

People often mistake determination for greed, forward planning could be seen as being determined and after all, my new adventure would never have been possible with determination.

I had someone say to me today ‘things just work out for you’ and in some part that’s true.. but for the  most part they work out  because when I apply myself to something I really want, I do it whole heartedly.

Once you figure out you want something, if you don’t give it absolutely everything you have, you probably don’t want it bad enough.  When someone is determined to get something, be something or mean something you can see it their face, literally seeping from their pores.

But can you fake it until making it with determination? I know you can with confidence... but what would fake determination look like? If its not genuine is it real?... something to think about.

I think if you tried faking determination you would only be cheating yourself- you would be denying yourself of a chance to find something you don’t have to pretend you want, because you actually really do.

Go out and be determined to get something you want, if you cant think of anything just fake it and let me know how it feels

24. the balanced life

I think we are so strung up in trying to “be” the right thing most of the time, that sometimes it can consume us to the point of self destruction. I believe in being healthy, but I don’t believe in restricting the things that make us happy.

It’s ok when you drink a whole bottle (and a half)of red wine to yourself while watching pretty woman, heading straight for McDonalds after running around the lake, spending the whole week working hard just to get wreckless on the weekend, drinking 6 cups of coffee because you’re tired, telling the truth in embarrassing situations, bragging about the things that are going well for you,  missing a personal training session, calling in sick because you hate Mondays, Facebook stalking (on the rare occasion), asking why when you don’t understand, taking ownership of debatable music taste, saying sorry to an old friend, being angry at a new one, drunk dialling or writing, not writing back, being late with payments, saving to little or saving too much.

The list goes on..

If you don’t have balance in your life, things won’t feel right.  The upside to that is you get to be bad if you have been good lately.......